My truths

In an effort to rekindle some of former positive energy that has been lost in this rabbit hole called cancer, I decided to make a list of some simple truths about myself. It doesn't matter if anyone else believes them or not, I need to remind myself of them in order to remember who I was before cancer, during cancer, and who I want to be after cancer. Are you ready?

I am strong - both mentally and physically. Life hasn't been easy, but it's the things I've endured along the way that have molded me into the person that stands here today.

I love deeply and passionately. Sometimes that gets me into trouble, and my heart gets broken pretty often, but those lessons have taught me how to love differently in the future, and also how to love myself.

I am kind. I hold doors open for people, say thank you, return things that have been lost, and smile at others randomly, just for the pure joy of seeing their return smile.

I have learned a lot about the world through books, school, and travel. I can't wait to explore more places (I have ideas of where to go after treatment is over. What's your vote?)

I'm a homebody - but I like that about myself.

Although, as I've gotten older, I've gotten better at saying YES to life. (Example: I went to a nude beach last sumer. And I participated. Sorry mom and dad, if you're reading this.) Life is too short not to live it exactly how I please, and I plan on going on many more adventures from here on it. Next up this month: zip lining and rock climbing.

My beauty is not solely defined on the reflection in the mirror, or how well my clothes fit, or the number on the scale. I am beautiful because of so much more than those things. My willingness to share my pain with you, raw and unedited, makes me beautiful. The strength I've shown, but have hated to admit, or have a hard time seeing myself, makes me beautiful. My perseverance to not make cancer my entire life makes me beautiful. My scars and what they represent make me beautiful.

I am more than my cancer.


I'd love to add more to this list, but I have a hot date at the infusion center, so I need to go get ready. Will you do me a favor - tell me some of my truths from your perspective. I'd love to hear them, because I've admitted in the past, I'm pretty bad at recognizing the good qualities I possess. But, I think that needs to change. Starting now. I'm an awesome, badass warrior. And I think it's time everyone, including me, knows it. (Okay, maybe more people know it than I realize, and it's really only me that needs to be caught up to speed.)