Forgiveness

I wrote this to a friend the other day, and figured it was worth writing here, too.

"I can't even look in the mirror for too long because I don't recognize the reflection. I admire Harmony's ability to be thankful for her 'after cancer' body. I hate mine because all I can remember is the body that cancer took from me. And I know that it doesn't help that I feel like cancer took a lot of other things from me too - my state of mind, my body, some of my relationships, being happy, and the ability to find silver linings. I need to find a way to forgive cancer for taking those things from me."

The last line is the most important.

I need to find a way to forgive cancer, so I can move on and move forward with my life. But, I know that won't be easy, especially with such a long road of active treatment still ahead of me.

One of my new years resolutions was to be more forgiving, of myself, and of others. Cancer is no exception.